Larry Flynt Asks for Bailout of the Porno Industry

2009 January 8
by Mr Pink Eyes

 After reading this story I just couldn’t help myself, I had to write about it. Larry Flynt and the CEO of the Girls Gone Wild videos are now asking for a federal bailout of the porno industry. Whenever I write about the bailout fiasco I ask, “where will it end?”, and more and more it appears that it will not end.

 Everyone is lining up for free government money so why shouldn’t the publisher of Hustler magazine be next?

“People are too depressed to be sexually active,” Flynt said in the statement. “This is very unhealthy as a nation. Americans can do without cars and such but they cannot do without sex.”

“With all this economic misery and people losing all that money, sex is the farthest thing from their mind. It’s time for congress to rejuvenate the sexual appetite of America. The only way they can do this is by supporting the adult industry and doing it quickly.”

 Barack Obama has promised to heal the nation and I guess that according to the above logic we should start with the porno industry. After all what is more important than the health and welfare of the American people?

 Larry Flynt is asking for $5 billion for congress to “rejuvenate the sexual appetite of America”, a small price to pay I suppose. I have seen breast cancer bumper stickers that read, save the ta-tas. So let me declare, it is time for the federal government to bailout the porno industry. Save the ta-tas. 

 While this is going nowhere and please take the above for the sarcasm that it is, it does reflect on my biggest concern with this bailout bullshit. Everyone is lining up for free money from the government. But free money isn’t free, it comes from somewhere. It comes from us.

 As more and more people put their hands out for money that does not belong to them I once again ask the question, where does it end?

 We need to have companies take responsibility for their actions, we need to stop rewarding bad behavior, we need to stop giving private businesses money from the taxpayers who did nothing to deserve having their money taken from them to bailout those that can’t run a profitable business.

 But most of all we need to save the ta-tas.

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6 Responses leave one →
  1. 2009 January 8

    My question is, “What will the Government want to take away from us in return for what they give us!?”

  2. 2009 January 9
    Kimbo permalink

    Bailout 2008, a poem by David Jeffrey

    Like a bloodied warrior,
    laying broken and torn.

    Like a dying soldier, hopeless and forlorn.

    But the blood, it be green,
    the color of money.

    And the soldier is an economy,
    and it is anything but funny.

    Broken are it’s people and shattered are their dreams.

    Thanks to the ultra rich and their full proof schemes.

    It is a tragedy with more pain to come.

    Finance will be Hell, and their wills will be done.

  3. 2009 January 11
    Deb permalink

    Whoa, @#$%^&* whoa. Larry Flynt is still alive? I think of any business in existence, this is one that is completely on it’s own. No matter what Larry says ( people need sex to be healthy (??!!!)) Getting a government bailout for something so frivolous and unnecessary, is ridiculous.

  4. 2009 January 11

    Мог бы долго с вами спорить на эту тему :)

  5. 2009 June 9
    D.R. Sanchez permalink

    I love this poem

    David Jeffrey poems are awesome!!

  6. 2009 June 20
    Alotta Vagena permalink

    I love David Jeffrey!!

    His poems all rock!!

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